Obsessive-compulsive disorder (OCD) is a common aftereffect of childhood abuse. OCD is driven by anxiety, and the OCD symptoms help the anxious person to manage his anxiety.
I used to struggle with a number of OCD symptoms. Some would come and go, such as blowing on my hands. Others lingered for years, such as saying a mantra in my head to reduce my anxiety. Some were just amusing but not harmful, such as having to check the alarm clock exactly three times before falling asleep. As I have healed from my past and reduced my anxiety, my need for these OCD behaviors subsided. I still have some residue, but most are now healed.
OCD is all about taking control. As a child, I had no control over my life or even my own body. So, I sought control in things that did not matter through my OCD symptoms. My anxiety would build and build, but I could release some of it by doing one of my OCD actions. If I had to hold it in for whatever reason, the anxiety would build until it was nearly unbearable.
One secret to reducing anxiety is processing anger. I was unaware of having rage issues because I stuffed the anger deep inside of myself. It was not safe for me to express anger as a child, so I denied it. When you do not express emotions, they become more powerful. It is only in expressing them that they can be released and then lose their power over you.
When you do not express your anger and stuff it down inside of yourself, it turns on you in the form of anxiety and/or depression. Many people who struggle with severe anxiety and/or depression are angry people who rarely express those emotions. As you start expressing your rage, it finally has somewhere to go, and you will feel your anxiety ease.
This is exactly what happened to me. I had accepted that I would always be “weird” with my OCD symptoms. Through therapy, I learned to how process and honor my anger in a safe manner (that is, after I came to realize that I even had anger to process). As I processed my anxiety, my anxiety level went down substantially. Today, I feel very little anxiety, so I have no need for my OCD symptoms to manage it. When I notice that I am feeling compelled to do those OCD things again, I explore what repressed anger might be driving them, express the anger, and then experience relief from the compulsions again.
Related Topics:
- Trauma Tuesday: Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) and the Traumatized Adopted Child
- How to Identify Signs of Obsessive Compulsive Disorder
- How to Identify Symptoms of OCD
- How to Minimize the Effects of OCD
- How to Cure OCD
Photo credit: Lynda Bernhardt
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i suffer from OCD and I do believe that it is possibly linked to childhood trauma when i was little my mom was abused and it took a huge tole on me so i do believe that was enough to do it
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I’m trying to find out if my husband has OCD because he does double check doors to make sure they are locked but most of all he is so obsessive of me, his wife. He feels that there is nothing wrong with him being close by myside in every thing I DO. He does not want me to go anywhere without him. He doesnot want me to go see my daughters or grandchildren with out him, he does not want me to go see my mom without him, absolutely nowhere with out him. HE ONLY WANTS IT TO BE ME AND HIM in my life. He blames me and will tell me I DON’T love him if I don’t want to be with him 24/7. We have only been married almost 3 yrs and this is so bad, that I DONT LIKE BEING MARRIED ANYMORE. I am open for any help. He actually sits half way on me when we sit down, he says he likes to be close to me. He told me tonight that I want my cake and eat it to because I told him I was going to go spend the night with my granddaughter that is 3 yrs old that is having surgery. but he doesnt think i should leave him. this is our big fight he wants to control me and doesnt want me going anywhere with out him. what can i do?
Hello Shirley,
Just seen your comment, I’m sorry if I speak out of term but this is just my own opinion so please go with your own thoughts. I work with women who experience domestic abuse and it sounds like your husband is using power and control to keep you with him and not be free. It may be his own anxieties but if you feel inside trapped that you can’t even see your family then perhaps you should contact your local woman’s aid number for some advice so even if you don’t want to leave him, you can be in a better position or understanding of what is happening.
On a side note – i originally came to this site as I have had ocd for ages and by talking therapy about past abuse there is a definite link so thank you for the post.
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I am so thankful that you posted this article. I am tired of everyone ignoring the fact that OCD can be caused by abuse. Thank you
wow this speaks to me so much. i was hit and beaten often as a child and from age 4 i had crippling ocd. i still struggle with it but it made me cry to know someone else understands. wow.