Evidence of My Mother/Abuser’s Subconscious Memory of Abuse

In my blog entry yesterday, I kicked off the topic of whether it is possible for a child abuser to “forget” or repress memories of abusing a child. My mother is a person who does not appear to have any conscious memories of having been an abuser or of delivering her own children to a [...]

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Is it Possible for an Abuser to “Forget” the Abuse?

On my blog entry entitled Remembering Sexual Abuse Incidents but Not the Rapes, readers posted the following comments: Is is possible for an abuser to forget the abuse that he or she did, or to forget the abuse that he or she enabled? I know the victim can forget – can the abuser(s)? ~ Lilo [...]

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Regaining Your Power by Dismantling Lies

Today I am going to talk about a topic that will most likely only appeal to those of you who are further along in healing. When I first heard about this topic when I was early into my healing journey, I rejected it outright. However, I have come to appreciate the wisdom of this topic, [...]

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Thankful for All of You

In honor of Thanksgiving, I would like to take a break from the intense topics we have been exploring this week and focus on being thankful. I have a friend who writes down what she is thankful for every Thanksgiving, so I thought I would do the same here. Feel free to tell me what [...]

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What is Normal Hymen Bleeding after Rape?

*** sexual abuse and hymen triggers** I have received some questions about the hymen bleeding after the first consensual intercourse when the person recovers memories of childhood rapes. I did not know that this could happen, either. The memories I dissociated the hardest were the vaginal rapes. I wanted to believe that they had never [...]

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How Can a Person “Forget” a Childhood Rape?

Remember in the 1990’s when recovering repressed memories was all the rage? Then, right on the heels of this came the propaganda that any memory that you have not always had in your conscious memory is suspect. Talk shows covered false memory syndrome, accused therapists of planting memories of abuse, etc. I don’t think society [...]

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Remembering Sexual Abuse Incidents but Not the Rapes

I recently wrote a blog entry entitled Is it Possible to Have Been Raped as a Girl and Not Remember?. After this blog entry published, I received emails from readers asking me to discuss this topic further. This is my first installment. If you have specific questions or issues you would like for me to [...]

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Observations after 10 Days of Mindfulness/Staying Present

As I write this, I have been focusing on trying to stay present (mindfulness) for roughly 10 days. I thought I would share my observations so far and then check in from time to time on my progress. (Yes, I am hoping to continue to make progress!) First, mindfulness is definitely a skill to be [...]

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Theophostics

On my blog entry entitled Blinders from Not Living in the Present, a reader mentioned Theophostics as an effective healing tool. I did not know much about it, so I thought I would do some research into it and share what I learned with all of you. Of primary importance is the fact that Theophostics [...]

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Importance of Cutting Off Contact with Abusers

On my blog entry entitled Blinders from Not Living in the Present, a reader posted the following comment: Also, you don’t account for those of us, who unfortunately, still have contact with the people that hurt us. I know that your solution is to cut all contact, but your situation is different. Your sister had [...]

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