Archive for November 27th, 2007

Girl by hut (c) Lynda Bernhardt

Mother-daughter sexual abuse is a particularly vile form of sexual abuse that many people are unaware even exists. In the United States, mothers are often viewed as the self-sacrificing member of the family who repeatedly suffers on behalf of her children. While this description is certainly true of many mothers, it is not true of all.

Women who have suffered from mother-daughter sexual abuse often fear that nobody will believe that this form of abuse happened to them. Instead, they fear that others will believe they are “crazy.” Many people are judgmental of any opinion toward a mother that is not “warm and fuzzy.” In most cases, when a daughter speaks ill of her mother, people assume that the daughter is being ungrateful and does not appreciate all of the sacrifices that her mother made for her. In the case of mother-daughter sexual abuse, the sexual abuse survivor has every right to express anger toward her abuser. The abuser does not get a free pass just because she is her victim’s mother.

I wrote an in-depth article on this topic for Associated Content. In that article, I talked about some issues that are specific to survivors of this form of abuse. I also mentioned a website specifically for survivors of mother-daughter child abuse. The name of that site is Making Daughters Safe Again. The site includes a message board for members only. Anyone who has suffered from mother-daughter sexual abuse can join, but the message board is private for the protection of those needing to discuss the very difficult issues surrounding recovery from mother-daughter sexual abuse.

If you are a survivor of mother-daughter sexual abuse, you are not alone. You can heal from this form of abuse, just as many other women have. I strongly suggest connecting with other women who have suffered from this form of abuse because they understand the specific issues that you are facing. You can do that through Making Daughters Safe Again. Another good resource is Isurvive. While Isurvive does not have a forum specifically for mother-daughter sexual abuse, several members have discussed this topic in the Survivors of Incest and Sexual Abuse forum. You are not alone.

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Photo credit: Lynda Bernhardt

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