I must confess that I am a little freaked out today. I probably shouldn’t be, but I can should myself all day, and I am still going to feel what I feel.
I just found out that somebody I used to associate with in the early 1990’s was convicted on felony fraud charges and then blew his head off to avoid going to prison. Yikes!
Admittedly, I always knew that this man was a bit “off.” Hub and I went to graduate school with the guy, and we were nice to him because he really did not seem to have any friends. We knew him for a whole year before we ever found out that he was married. We then started double-dating with him and his wife from time to time. They were both a little odd but seemed harmless enough.
They were in the news recently for defrauding customers and the government. He was convicted of the charges and committed suicide to avoid having to serve his time. I am not sure about the outcome of the wife’s situation.
This is not the first time that I have found out that someone I used to associate with committed a felony. When I was in high school, I used to talk with a girl in one of my classes. We weren’t close or anything, but we did socialize throughout my sophomore year of high school. She is now on death row for killing two people.
The one that rocked me the most was someone who I considered to be a friend. These other cases involved acquaintances, but I felt close to the third one. We worked together for about a year. She was married to a pastor and was a very nice lady. We used to eat lunch together every day at work. We also socialized a little bit outside of work, but she had limited time because she had young children.
She wound up embezzling a large sum of money from the government. I can only imagine the level of scandal at her church when that hit the news. I don’t know if she wound up going to prison or not.
In all of these cases, these people committed their crimes years after I was hanging out with them. What bothers me is that I would not have pegged any of them for committing those crimes, especially the one who I considered to be a friend. If nothing else, my association with these people shows just how messed up I was before therapy. I like to think that, as I have healed, I am doing a better job in picking healthier people to spend my time with.
I guess I always felt like an outcast and befriended other outcasts. Unfortunately, not every outcast is a survivor looking to heal.
Photo credit: Lynda Bernhardt
Blooming Lotus 