Archive for December 21st, 2009

I am happy to report that I survived my weekend trip to see my sister graduate from college, which involved seeing my mother/abuser for the first time in six years. I guess I cannot fully say that I survived the trip quite yet because I am still on it as I write this. Our flight has been delayed due to fog, and if it does not lift soon, then we will miss our connecting flight, so traveling might be an all-day affair today. The good news is that it gives me plenty of time to blog about the weekend. :0) (It actually turned into a two-day traveling nightmare, which you can read about here.)

Where to start?? I had a rough week last week as D-day approached. I had to take Xanax to get to through the day, and I needed prescription medications to sleep at night. Even with all of the medication, I slept poorly (if at all), and I was wired and anxious during the day.

A friend of mine offered to come along and serve as my buffer, and she was great at this job. She kept me distracted and laughing during the flights down to see my sister. It was really amusing to see my dysfunctional family through her eyes. For example, my sister, who is in her late thirties, picked us up from the airport with pigtail in her hair. She was also wearing an odd hat on top of the pigtails. Seeing this view of my sister from my friend’s perspective was quite amusing.

On the ride over to the hotel, I asked my sister (again) about the plans for the following day. All that we had on our schedule was the graduation in the afternoon and then a party at my sister’s house afterward where “everyone” was invited to come. You would think that after ~ 50 phone calls, texts, and emails about this weekend, my sister would have clarified at some point that our mother/abuser was not included as part of “everyone,” doubly so since my sister knows all about the issues between my mother and me. No, the first time she informed me of my mother not being invited to the party was after I arrived. Better late than never, right??

This news helped to ease my anxiety because now I did not have to worry about being stuck in a small house with my mother for hours. This helped me to sleep a little better, and I actually did sleep well until the d@#$ alarm clock went off at 5:00 a.m. (and, yes, my friend and I did push the button to make sure that the alarm was not set, but it went off, anyhow.) At least I got some rest.

To be continued…

Photo credit: Lynda Bernhardt

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