Archive for December 14th, 2010

Bizarre Dreams

I had some bizarre dreams last night. First, I was washing dishes by hand in the kitchen sink (something I hate to do). I had just finished, but then more appeared, and I got to work at washing them. I was working very hard on a bowl coated in oatmeal when two sets of hands (one set on either side of me) started washing the rest of them. I looked up and found two men – nice college-age boys who were living in our house – washing them for me. I was so surprised because it is always my job to do all of the cleaning. I felt very special that they would help, and their reaction was that they were just pitching in – no big deal.

Then, I was living in my mother’s house as a teenager again. I was asleep in my bed when I heard the door open and my mother say, “Rise and shine!” like she used to do when I was a kid. She did this at the same time that two radio alarms went off in my room – one beside my bed and one on the stereo across the room. I was angry with her for doing this because I was responsible enough to wake myself up without her help.

I got out of bed, and I was overwhelmed by the numerous large piles of clean clothes all over my room. I turned off the alarm by my bed right away, but I had a hard time finding the power button to the stereo. The button had moved from its usual place, and I could not find it.

I went to the bathroom (same location as in my current house) to brush my teeth, and I was aghast to see the college boys walking around wearing nothing but towels while I was in my pajamas. (Keep in mind that I was a teenager in this dream.) I couldn’t use another bathroom, though, because renovations were going on, and the room they were using was a guest room being added onto this bathroom. So, I had to brush my teeth with these guys walking in and out. They didn’t even seem to notice me, but I felt uncomfortable being so “exposed” with a wall torn out of my bathroom.

I woke up and then went back to sleep. Here was the second round … I was so tired, and I just wanted to be able to sleep. A male friend of mine from college was there – someone I trusted who never once tried to take advantage of me. I kept wanting to sleep with him nearby so I would know that I was safe. (Side note – This has been a recurring theme in my dreams lately – seeking out “safe” people in my dreams to watch over me or let me sleep in their beds so I can sleep.)

There was also part of the dream that took place in a restaurant. A high school friend kept asking me why I wouldn’t call her at her new phone number. I kept telling her that it wasn’t safe. She kept saying that nothing had changed, but I got her to admit that the phone would ring at a public place, so we had no privacy when we talked. I kept wanting to sleep and kept trying to be with safe people so I could sleep.

Any theories on what this means? I know that bathroom dreams are about the most private part of yourself (bedrooms are pretty private, too). The piled clothing and kitchen sink represent my emotional “baggage.” I am a teenager in the dream (all high school and early college), so this relates to my mother’s abuse during that time and/or the college rapes. That was a period in my life of feeling very unsafe no matter where I went.

Photo credit: Hekatekris

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