Today I am climbing up on my soapbox, so consider yourself warned! I don’t know how much any of you have followed what is going on with online colleges in the news, but as fellow child abuse survivors, you need to know…
I have been working as an online college instructor for one of the well-known online universities since 2008. Online colleges are designed to meet the needs of the non-traditional student. Until I started getting to know my students, I did not realize just how many child abuse survivors are able to earn a college degree because of the existence of online universities like the one where I work. The ability to attend college online has been a real gift to numerous child abuse survivors who would not otherwise be able to go to college.
Of course, people from all walks of life are online students, but the majority is not straight out of high school like you see on most of the traditional college campuses. Numerous students are single parents who are working fulltime in dead-end jobs. Earning a college degree is the ticket out of their current life circumstances. If they had to find childcare and attend a ground campus, they would never be able to earn a college degree. However, by being able to log onto the computer after the children are in bed, they are able to make this huge commitment.
I have been surprised by how many fellow child abuse survivors are enrolled in online colleges. I have heard all sorts of stories because of the personal nature of the course that I facilitate. Once one student shares her story, others share theirs as well. I have had several students who grew up in the foster care system, abused wives who are secretly earning a college degree when the abusive partner is not home, and recovering addicts. More students with a history of child abuse have shared their story than I can count. Many of these students have told me that a “regular” college education would not have been possible for them. They are so grateful for having this option.
Many of the well-known online universities are for-profit, which has caused some people to question the motives of these colleges and the value of their degrees. My online university, as well as others, has made changes to the format of the classes to ensure that only students who are ready to take on the commitment do so and to set them up for success. My online university also offers free confidential counseling over the phone for all students. The counselors are equipped to handle everything from the basic stresses of time management to issues as serious as rape or suicide threats.
I applied for a job as an online college instructor because of the flexible hours. I never dreamed that I would be helping so many child abuse survivors by doing this. Even though my students will never know the details of my own history, I am able to believe in them and help them to have the confidence that they can rise above their childhood traumas. It is a real honor to work with these online students. I hope that these students will continue to have access to Federal financial aid (this has been the topic in the news) because without it, many won’t have access to the tools needed to create a better life for themselves. Watching insecure online students gain confidence in their ability to change the direction of their lives is the most rewarding part of my job.
Photo credit: Hekatekris
Blooming Lotus 
Thanks for the information. The online education is really coming into its own. I know an artist who is taking color theory on line. Did not see that one coming.
I went back to college when I was 40 and found it difficult yet much easier than when I was 17. In a real way I enjoyed it at 40 where I got through it when I was younger.
I also work for an online (actually a hybrid) college and have found the same demographic. One of my students is an agorophobic abused wife. She’s now actually coming out to our small campus for a few of her classes!
The stories I could tell are also countless and deeply moving. And I hope this option – online colleges – remains viable for folks needing a safer environment than traditional universities.
I won’t go on an on, just am up at 3 a.m. worrying about one of my students and here was your blog! Seemed like a gift to me.
Thank you for what you do for these student’s Faith, I see them face to face and can affirm the difference this makes in their lives.
with great respect,
ruby
Hi, Ruby.
I only teach online classes, but I see the faces at graduation. Seeing the very real faces behind the names on the screen is very moving. :0)
– Faith
What a great service. It’s obvious that you are a helper spirit.
I think that if there is any way to fight this epidemic of abuse, it’s on a core spiritual and emotional level… by sharing and paying attention to others red flags. You are such an active part of the fight and tremendous support for many.
Thank you Faith.
Peace,
mia
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I am making plans to attend next year. I went to college for the first time about 3 years ago. It was the beginning of my healing crisis. I have been living in the country, raising my kids- basically pretty sheltered from life, since leaving my parents home. I had put my past behind me. When my kids began to get older and more independent, I decided I would try college- something that was never even on my menu- I so thought I was so stupid.
Half way through, I dropped the class, even though I was getting an A- It was Human Development. I didn’t realize at that point that I had PTSD. Now I understand what happened. My therapist is encouraging me to try again. I so much would love to work with abused children- the ones that are severely abused. But degrees are necessary.
I was told on-line classes were pretty difficult and not real great. Maybe I will try one and see how I like it.
Thanks for the encouragement!
Hi, HP.
I would say that online courses are the equivalent of ground classes as far as rigor goes. I am speaking for my own school as well as one of our competitors where a friend is earning her Master’s degree. The big differences between the two are flexibility and personality responsibility.
When I attended a ground college, I had to have my paper ready for submission at the beginning of class. If I didn’t, I got a zero. Online classes are built around flexibility for the nontraditional student, so deadlines aren’t always quite so cut and dry. Instead, you might lose a letter grade per day the paper is late instead of getting a zero. You can’t beat online college for flexibility!
However, the downside is personality responsibility. My students don’t have to see the disappointed look on my face when they miss a deadline. They also don’t have to be “in class” at any particular time, which means that it can be much easier to procrastinate or not show up at all.
Also, depending upon the online school, you might have to do all of the learning on your own by reading the course materials. Instead of lecturing, I facilitate classroom discussion in a message board format, which I believe provides a richer experience for the student. If you are an aural learner (learn by hearing), this format might be harder. However, if you are a visual or read/writer learner, it is actually a superior way to learn (in my opinion).
I would look into the online option and see if it is for you or not. I, personally, prefer this mode of learning because I don’t learn aurally. (Lectures bore me to tears!) I would much rather read the materials and have an online discussion. I find it is a better use of my time. :0)
– Faith
Hi, Faith
I have been reading your blog for several months now. Thank you for writing and sharing. Up to now I have not commented though your blog helps me great deal!
I have never officially graduated high school meaning I never was allowed to take finals, go to graduation, etc. My mother got my diploma but never gave it to me. Because she never left me alone after I left home( she was my main abuser) no matter how many times I tried to go to college I never lasted more then a half or semester partly because I was attacked by my abusers on the way to and from campus, partly because I am terrified of failure although my school grades were As and Bs. I considered online college but never even thought that it would be affordable with financial aid. I can barely afford to feed my family abd go to therapy that I desperately need and can’t get enough to pay for. I gave up on college thinking it is out of my reach. I never even thought that online college courses could be covered by financial aid. I have hope now, thank you for that!
And once more, thank you for writing this blog. I se how many people are grateful fir it, and I sm one of those!
Matreshka ( matreshka in Russian is stacking doll with smaller dolls inside bigger ones. Since I found out that I am D.I.D I always thought it’s a great metaphor for people like us.)
Hi, Matreshka.
In the United States, you can take out Federal student loans to pay for college whether it is for a ground campus or online. You can even take out additional funds to help with your living expenses. (This is how my sister has been able to afford going to college as as single mother.)
The Obama administration is looking into whether to allow this to continue with for-profit online colleges. The reason given is that the drop-out rate is much higher for online students and accounts for a high percentage of defaulted student loans. Those who drop out are less likely to be able to repay the loans, which is a legitimate concern.
To reduce the dropout rate for online colleges, many of the larger online colleges have made changes to help increase the retention rate and continue enabling their students to have access to Federal student loans. Some have a FREE orientation class to help students acclimate, the thinking being that students can drop out if it is not for them before any loans have been taken out. Some have also revamped their early classes (where students have historically been more likely to drop out) to set the students up for success.
I can only speak for my own school (which is one of the largest in the U.S.) … these changes are working! I facilitate entry-level classes, and I am seeing a much higher retention rate in my classes. I don’t think the school is ready to issue a formal “success” press release, but informal discussions among the faculty is that these measures are working.
Back to you … Going to college is an option for you, and earning a college degree will open doors for you. If you want to take out student loans to go to an online college, I would look into it sooner rather than later in case that funding winds up getting cut. Of course, I am hoping that it won’t for many reasons, but the reality is that this is a possibility. This is one reason I wanted to speak out about it here because, if funding is cut for online students, it will affect a disproportionate number of child abuse survivors.
– Faith
online or distance learning has been wonderful for me/us…
it suits our style of learning and the self paced environment of it all here, means that we felt less pressure, and less pressure meant we didnt procrastinate and therefore fail..
we ended up doing a year course in 2 months.
The timeliness of this post for my life is amazing.
At the beginning of my tenth grade year I had to quit high school (due to a medical issue that I now know related to the abuse) but I did get a GED when I was 16.
12 years later, and I have been married, had a child, moved around…and the economy (as well as other issues) have hit my family hard.
Last year I thought about joining the military as a means to obtain a college education that I realized was needed to improve our financial situation as well as something that I really wanted to do for myself-to prove to myself that yes, I could do it. I won’t go into all that happened with that, but just say that the interviews with recruiters did not go well, and I was very crushed. I pretty much stagnated for the next year and felt worthless and hopeless.
In the last month I have decided that I want to do college and I am not going to let the past hold me back from that anymore. Online classes are really what I am needing (partly because of the flexibility in schedule and partly because it is very possible we will be moving this year and I need to be able to not be tied down to a ground campus).
Making that decision is one thing…but actually doing it, has been quite another. I feel very overwhelmed. Not knowing where to start with financial aid (which would be a necessity for me) or applying, or where to apply. I just sit and stare at the college websites and feel myself shut down.
Anyway. I say all of that, to say that I had no idea there was a chance that financial aid might not be available for online colleges. It reinforces the fact that I need to make a decision and move forward on this issue. Thank you for sharing about that.
Hi, Tracie.
Many of big online colleges are reputable, and their recruiters are really great. If you will call one of them, the recruiter will walk you through the whole process. I would recommend trying out a school that offers a “try it before you buy it” orientation class. I know that at least one of the biggies offers that.
I have an offline friend who researched several schools that had a Master’s program in what she was looking for. The recruiters for her top choices were excellent. They walked her through the financial aid process and were up front about the how much financial aid she would need to earn her degree.
My students all seem to love their recruiters. The recruiters are good about calling them weekly to ask how their classes are going, etc. (I facilitate entry-level classes.) You also get an academic counselor after you enroll who will check in with you regularly and answer any questions that you have.
I would call one of the reputable online colleges and at least learn about how it all works. You don’t have to make a commitment during that phone call. If you agree, the recruiter will call you back to answer any questions you might still have. If you tell them you are no longer interested, they should leave you alone. :0)
I am not endorsing any of these schools in particular, but faculty at my school also work for these schools and say good things about them. They are all large online colleges who I know are reputable based upon the experiences of fellow faculty members:
* Argossy University
* Axia College of University of Phoenix
* Drexel University
* Kaplan University
* Strayer University
* University of Phoenix
* Walden University
– Faith
I found this to be a very interesting post. I am also a survivor of child abuse and am attending an online college. I also have discovered that many of my classmates are trauma survivors and most of us are earning our degrees much later in life than students who attend “ground colleges.” I feel I am getting a very strong education from the University that I am attending online.
I just wanted to write and thank you for this post, Faith. I dropped out of high school last year due to mental health problems from sibling abuse and incest. I got a full-time job and earned my GED.
Then I wanted to go to college. All of the kids my age were talking about going straight to four-year universities out of state. I already felt “inadequate” for holding a GED instead of a diploma, so I demanded of myself that I go to a “real” college too.
Your post has further reassured me (along with my parents) that there is no “right” way to do one’s education, as long as you know what you need to know. And it’s encouraging to know that I’ll meet lots of different kinds of students at online college–including some who have gone through some of things I have.
I’m continuing to work, but I’m also starting a few online courses to get started. Thanks again for being so inspiring and helpful!
I actually went to and just graduated from a ‘ground’ college with a Bachelor of Arts in Psychology. It took me 5 years. It took I don’t know how much personal strength and butt-kicking to make myself go through it, and I still don’t know how I did. Especially considering the summer before my 3rd year is the summer I was r*ped and ab*sed for six weeks. That next semester, I had 18 credits. I also discovered that I was really more of a “we,” and that my insider parts are all under 18, as far as I know. And I also recalled the childhood s*xual ab*se my father did.
….Wow, I’m even more amazed I got through 5 years of college now LOL! I wish that I’d been able to do online when I started. However, I was living with my toxic family at the time, and being able to leave the house, even if just for classes, was a life-saver. The very last year, I moved into the dorms, and it was absolutely incredible. It wasn’t perfect by any means–I definitely did not get along with my roommates, especially as some genius in Housing decided I should be with all freshmen [totally different stages of life when you’re 22 and a senior and your roomies are 18 and freshmen, y’know?]–but it was so wonderful to feel a sense of independence and know that I didn’t have to live with my parents.
I am thinking, however, of trying to do my Master’s/PhD [haven’t decided yet] online, because I don’t know if I could make it through more classes at a physical university campus. Not without a lot more healing, anyway!
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